After breakfast, my father likes to sit in his office in front of the computer, “checking his email,” which usually translates into reading some emails then getting lost in Facebook or the vortex of conservative websites. We’ve finally reached the point where he gets me to look at anything that sounds like a scam. It took some serious disasters for him to finally accept that it’s best to check with me whenever something sounds sketchy or too good to be true. I look them up if I’m not sure. The Internet is full of reported scams. According to the Federal Trade Commission (FTC), “…consumers reported losing more than $10 billion to fraud in 2023.” Many target the elderly. If there really is a Hell, may there be a special Dantesque circle for scammers and hackers that tortures them horribly for eternity.
In a particularly cruel phone scam, someone looked for seniors on social media and targeted my parents: “Hello, this is your grandson.” I suppose he counted on most people reacting to this by saying the grandson’s name, like “Chris?” My mother was alive and her dementia hadn’t fully bloomed yet, the first time this scammer tried it. He said, “Yes, Chris. I was in an accident. Drunk driving. I’m in jail and need bail money.”
My mother, fortunately, was instantly suspicious. “Where’s your wife?” she asked.
“Oh,” he said, “she’s working.” My mother knew that was unlikely. His wife taught a class at night, not during the day. She took care of their kids during the day. This was in the morning.
“What’s your wife’s name?” she asked.
He said, “What, you don’t know her name?”
“I don’t believe you’re Chris. You don’t sound like him,” she said. “I’m calling him,” and she hung up. She called Chris, who assured her that he was not in jail and had not been in any accident. She ranted about that call for over a year to everyone, multiple times. The call had scared her. For a few minutes she was terrified for her grandson. We were lucky she didn’t fall for the scheme. This same caller tried again about a year after she died. This time, my father thought it was real. Apparently, he had forgotten about the previous, similar call. Fortunately, Dad called out to me and said, “I think Chris is in some kind of trouble.” I spoke into the phone.
“Who is this?”
“This is Chris. I’m in trouble. I need bail money.”
“Oh really? What’s your wife’s name?”
“How come you don’t know my wife’s name? Why are you asking this? Why can’t you just send me the bail money?” He actually started cursing at me.
“You’re not Chris. Go F--- yourself. If you ever call here again you will wish the cops got to you first,” I snarled into the phone and hung up. Obviously, I had no way to track this guy down, but I thought he should hear someone threaten him.
Dad was upset. “Are you sure that wasn’t Chris?”
“Yes,” I said, but I texted my nephew anyway to reassure him. “Nope, that wasn’t me. I’m fine,” he texted back. That comforted my father, but the call made him nervous. By now, I’ve convinced him, for the most part, not to answer any number he doesn’t recognize. Sometimes he forgets and answers, anyway, but he’s good about not believing anything anymore. He likes playing with them sometimes, saying, “Really? And why would I want that? Is that so?” Then he hangs up.
It’s the email and website scams that are the most concerning. One day my father was on a Home Depot website looking for something. An ad popped up for some kind of “limited opportunity.” He could get a pair of Air iPods for free if he filled in that form and paid a few dollars for the postage fee -- by credit card, of course. My father can’t resist a good deal. I discovered the scam when the iPods arrived. They were, of course, knocks offs, though he didn’t believe me. They wouldn’t stay charged, and they weren’t quite the same size as Air iPods in photos I found on line. The box they came in didn’t say “Apple” or “Mac” or any usual Apple product logo. I checked his credit card to find that he’d been charged full price, not just the postage. The woman in the Discover fraud department was very helpful in getting his money back. He kept the supposed iPods, though he never used them. I tried them. They did not work well and died within an hour. They won’t recharge.
He did this again with an offer to try a CBD oil. He was sure it was legit. They wanted people to try it and then buy it if they liked it. They sent him another bottle without his permission and charged a huge amount of money. The oil did nothing but stain a pair of good slippers when he spilled some. I called the number on the credit card statement. I got some woman who said, “I’m sorry you didn’t like it. Do you want to stop the automatic re-supply shipment?”
“Yes,” I said. “Of course I do. You had no right to ship it to him and charge it without his permission.”
“I’m sorry,” she said, and passed me on to some man. I had to explain the problem again.
“My father got sucked into your ad for a free trial, but he did not agree to pay for more shipments of it. The stuff doesn’t even work. You need to stop sending it to him and give him his money back. I’ll gladly return the unopened new bottle.”
“Our ad states in fine print at the bottom that we will continue to send you more at full price. (The “fine print” is so small it’s extremely difficult to see, let alone read. The rest of the ad is in a huge font.) The first bottle was the only free one,” he said. “I’m insulted that you’re saying it didn’t work. You need to give it more time. We will stop sending him more, but we won’t return the money.”
“If you don’t,” I threatened, “I’m going to file a complaint with the Better Business Bureau and the FBI. This is a scam.”
“That’s insulting,” he said. “We’re not returning his money.” I hung up and filed a complaint with the Better Business Bureau and the FBI website for reporting scams. The Discover credit card department helped to stop any further charges to them, but it was the Better Business Bureau that got those scammers to refund the money. We didn’t even have to send back the unwanted bottle.
Another time, my father must have accidentally downloaded a Trojan horse when he opened an email. The hackers got his email and Bank of America passwords. They changed the phone number on record in his Bank of America website and set their own in there (not traceable) so they could change all the passwords. The login verification code went to that number, so we didn’t even know Dad had been hacked till Bank of America sent him an email about a large withdrawal ($500) that looked suspicious to them. (They eventually refunded him that money.) We had to go into their office and have them physically create a new account for him. While we were on the phone with their IT security guy who was in both of Dad’s old and new accounts while talking to us about them, the hackers tried to move money from the new account back into the old one. The IT guy stopped them, but realized he couldn’t create a secure enough account to stop them from getting into it again. My father ended up closing out the account completely and withdrawing all of his money. He opened an account in an entirely different bank. We had to take his computer to Best Buy’s Geek Squad to get rid of any Trojan horse or other malware.
Recently, Dad’s identity was stolen. Someone got his Social Security number and phone number and put them on the dark web. We don’t know how. The hacker tried to take out several lines of credit in two different banks. Fortunately, Discover’s anti-theft security department, which Dad subscribes to, caught it. We had to freeze his credit on all the credit reporting companies and change all his passwords, etc.
A week later, we discovered someone had stolen out of the USPS mail the new credit card one of his credit card companies sent out to replace an old one.
The phone rings interminably at terrible times, like when we sit down to eat, or late at night. Dad’s gotten much better about ignoring unfamiliar phone numbers and scam emails. I get many of them myself. I don’t know what the solution is, but there must be something that society or the government can do. Unfortunately, most of these hackers and scammers will never get caught because it’s impossible to trace them. We have to be really vigilant with our emails and online presence. Also, don’t answer any phone calls from unfamiliar numbers. Here’s a link to a website that gives important information on how to avoid being scammed: Financial Counseling Association of America.
Yes, there is a specail place of torment for these horrible human scum! Glad you are there to help him.